Overwhelm in day to day life usually builds quietly, often from an accumulation of simple things. There’s too much to do, and not enough space or capacity to do it.
It shows up physically before it shows up dramatically. A tight chest. Shallow breathing. Holding your breath while you complete a small task. A mind flicking between emails, messages and unfinished jobs. Difficulty sitting still, even for a few minutes.
Nothing catastrophic is happening. But your system behaves as if it’s under threat.
What overwhelm really is
At its most basic level, overwhelm is often cognitive load. Too many open loops competing for attention. Multiple decisions waiting to be made. Too many unfinished tasks sitting in the background. It’s fair to say that your physical and environmental states have an impact too, but that’s not for this article.
Psychological research helps explain why unfinished tasks feel so mentally heavy. In the 1920s, Bluma Zeigarnik found that people remember incomplete tasks more easily than completed ones, a phenomenon now known as the Zeigarnik effect. Unfinished work creates a kind of mental tension, keeping it active in your mind until it’s resolved. Closely related is the Ovsiankina effect, which shows that people feel a natural pull to return to interrupted tasks and complete them.
Together, these findings suggest that your brain is wired to hold onto what is unfinished and to seek closure. When you carry too many open loops at once, that built-in tension accumulates and begins to feel like overwhelm.
References:
In other words, the mind does not like unfinished business. The more open loops you carry, the more tension you feel.
On top of that load, certain patterns can amplify the pressure.
The finish line illusion
One is the finish line illusion. You tell yourself you will relax when this task is done. When the email is sent, the call is over, or the document is complete. Relief becomes conditional on completion. But there is always another task waiting. The finish line moves, and so does the tension.
The space reflex
Another is the space reflex. The moment there is a gap, your mind rushes to fill it. Instead of allowing stillness, you reach for something else to do. Space feels inefficient. Movement feels safer.
When volume, the finish line illusion and the space reflex combine, overwhelm usually follows. You’re either racing towards the next micro completion or avoiding the discomfort of empty space. Your mind and body rarely settle.
Most people respond in one of three ways.
- They finish the task. Completion brings short relief and reduces one open loop.
- They distract themselves. Writing, games, socialising or exercise create a clean break and temporarily reset the system.
- Or they get organised. They write everything down, externalise the mental load and re prioritise.
Each strategy can be useful. Finishing reduces tension. Distraction can reset your state. Organisation reduces cognitive clutter.
The problem is when all this runs on autopilot, unaware you’re in tension and an overwhelm cycle.
How to manage feeling overwhelmed
The shift begins with recognising that overwhelm is not a personal failure. It’s often a predictable response to accumulated open loops and unclear prioritisation.
Instead of asking how do I get rid of this feeling, a better question is what is actually driving it right now.
Is it genuine volume, poor boundaries or unclear priorities? Is it the belief that I must clear everything before I can rest.
Sometimes the right move is to reduce the load. Say no. Delay something. Remove a commitment.
Sometimes it’s to choose one meaningful task and accept the rest will wait.
Sometimes it’s to allow a short period of stillness without reaching for the next thing.
There will always be more to do. That’s a condition of modern life. Overwhelm becomes inevitable when you try to resolve everything at once, or when you tie your sense of calm to the constant crossing of small finish lines.
The aim is not to eliminate demands. It’s to manage load deliberately, and to separate the volume of work from your sense of worth.
Overwhelm is a signal. It tells you the system is carrying too many open loops or unclear decisions.
Notice the tension. Externalise the load. Choose deliberately.
You do not need to sprint through everything. You need to decide what matters now and let the rest wait.