The space reflex is the instinct to fill unstructured time with activity, and knowingly or not, avoid emotional exposure.

It can be difficult to catch, because we’re busy and life doesn’t typically have much natural space to “just be”.

It’s true that productivity and progress can be a form of happiness. But so can peace. By default, most people gravitate to doing something, either physically or mentally. It could be sorting the washing, socialising, going for a run or reading a book – all positive and add value.

However, there can be important information available when we stop and feel. Sometimes that can mean we have to face challenging realities or realisations. But other times we can feel peace, pride and contentment. That’s the prize of doing the work, when we stopped before, and things didn’t feel so good.

The space reflex and deliberate living

Recognising the space reflex is part of deliberate living. When you notice the urge to fill every gap, you create the possibility of choosing differently. Instead of reacting automatically, you can pause, check what’s actually driving the movement and decide whether action or stillness is more aligned with what matters. That small shift from reflex to choice is where steadiness begins.

When space appears, sit with it. Notice what you feel, take action if needed or enjoy the peace of not.